Insanity – Chapter 8

An Afghani farmer stands in the middle of his poppy field in Delaram, Afghanistan, watching U.S. Marines from 3rd Battalion, 8th Marine Regiment Combat Train conduct a resupply convoy down Highway 515, from Delaram to Bakwa, Afghanistan, March 25, 2009. The Iraqi government is working to eradicate poppy cultivation throughout the country to improve the health, security and development of Afghanistan. Alternative livelihoods for farmers are being planned and implemented. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

by Madeline Laughs

I made my way out of the park to the parking lot and found my rental car. Sitting in the driver’s seat I pulled my cell phone from my pocket to see I had 5 missed calls. All of them were from Paul . I held the phone debating whether or not I wanted to return his calls when it vibrated in my hand and the caller ID read “Paul calling”. I snapped it open and said hello.

Before Paul had deployed to the Middle East I had tried my best to help him out of a few jams. At the time I was running a fundraising campaign for an art group I was involved with. Paul had expressed an interest, so I had put him in charge of helping with the online page.

The online fund raising site we were using was one that you could use to raise money for just about anything. I told Paul that he might want to think about raising some money to pay off his late wife’s school loans. After she died he was still responsible for paying this debt. I thought that was awful and told him to write the school and ask for a pardon. He said he had already done that and they refused.

So I told him I would help him do a fund raiser. I spent days trying to gather enough information from him to make a poignant plea and he caged and skirted giving me details. I kept asking him if he was being vague because he was ashamed to ask for the money and he assured me he wasn’t. I finally sent him the pages I had written along with the information on how to set up the fund raiser and decided that if he wanted the money bad enough, he could do it himself.

Later he told me he wanted to get a better job and asked if I would help him make a resume. I agreed to do this for him. When I started asking questions about his past work history including dates etc., he once again became cagey. This was another project started that I eventually gave up completing.

The second day of Paul ‘s deployment to Afghanistan I checked my email to see if he had sent me a message that he had arrived there safely and found nothing from him. I opened Facebook and sent a private message to Darby asking her to call me when she had time and gave her my cell phone number. 

Insanity – Chapter 7

Torso di Barbie (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

by Madeline Laughs

After snapping several gorgeous photos of the polar bear lying on his back sleeping I stood there for a long time just watching him and admiring his great big paws. My cell phone started vibrating in my pocket and I pulled it out to check the Caller ID and saw that it was my husband. Clicking it on I made my way over to the benches in the exhibit and sat down to tell him all about my day so far.

While we were chatting my call waiting chimed in. I didn’t check it because I have a rule when I talk to my husband. I never put hm on hold to take another call. Whoever it was could leave a message and I’d call them back. A beep signaled that they had done just that, left a message. Not long after the first call beeped in the call waiting chimed again followed by a beep they had also left a message. Then it chimed in again. I no longer had to wonder who was calling. I knew it was Paul and his standard obsessive/compulsive calling until I picked up. I decided he could wait until I left the zoo and was back in my car for a call back.  

Insanity – Chapter 6

The Colombian armed forces around the dead body of the notorious drug lord Pablo Escobar. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

by Madeline Laughs

I asked for directions to the zoo once I finished the paperwork for the rental car and got three different sets of them. I plugged Attractions into my GPS and followed those directions instead. Everyone at the rental car place was pessimistic about how much time it would take me to get there. I heard anywhere from 45 minutes to an hour. It took me 15 minutes to get there and that included parking.

I waited in line for my ticket and picked up a map of the zoo trying to figure out the quickest route to the polar bears. After picking the direction I wanted to go I let my mind wander a bit trying to remember some of the stories Paul had shared with me over the months.

His favorite story that he told me over and over again was about being a helicopter pilot in the Coast Guard. He was also their rescue swimmer and said there were many nights he spent floating in high seas waiting for the copter to come back and get him because they had to take the rescued person back to shore first. He said that he punched a woman in the face once to get her to calm down. He had cabled onto the sinking boat to rescue this family and the woman was holding a baby in her arms. He wanted to take the baby first and the woman refused to give it to him. So he punched her in the face and just took it from her. He said in situations like that there’s no time to try to reason with people. 

Insanity – Chapter 5

by Madeline Laughs

The taxi driver barreled down the freeway towards the rental car agency and I sat in the backseat planning the afternoon ahead of me. I knew the city had a zoo, but the best part was one of the attractions and I was excited to get there and spend my day watching one of my favorite animals, the polar bear.

It’s funny. The polar bear gives the impression of being this huge, cuddly beast. You’d like nothing more than to wrap your arms around one and hug him. That’s kind of the impression I got from my friend Paul too. He had an innocence about him and a way of complimenting you, or giving in at just the right moment and it always caught you completely off guard. He was believable and he felt safe. But he wasn’t safe at all and neither was the polar bear. Like the polar bear, Paul could bite down on your jugular and end your life without a second thought.

I now believed that Paul was a predator. 

Insanity – Chapter 4

by Madeline Laughs

when fear rules your life, it’s hard to resist taking a peek at it

I stood on the curb in front of the hotel and waited for my taxi. I kept mulling over in my head where my friendship with Paul had gone so horribly wrong. I knew in my heart I had tried to be a good friend to him, but it seemed to me that I was always getting the short end of the stick. I don’t know what I could have done differently except perhaps I could have controlled the amount of access he had to me. How could I have done that? I had never had to do that with a friend before, but then I had never been very friendly with Paul before. Perhaps the younger me had better instincts than the older me did and knew to keep my distance.

I had so much fun talking with Paul! He could have been a successful stand up comic if he knew how to apply himself and wasn’t so lazy. But I laughed constantly whenever we talked or chatted because he was just hysterically funny.

One night he popped up in chat and said “I’m going to add you to a secret Facebook group!” He explained that he was in a secret group with a few other people from the town where he lived and they talked about politics. I demurred and told him that didn’t sound very interesting to me. “But I already added you! Get in there and introduce yourself! And don’t let me down!” I truly wanted to smack him for throwing me out there like that, but I played along. I figured if I didn’t like it, I could always leave.